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I recently found out that my husband is a cross dresser. I have been married to him for 23 years and have 3 teenage children. This is very upsetting to our family. He refuses to see how this upsets us. He has a 21 year old son who is really having problems. He goes to work with bras and long fingernails on. He wears make-up, and I know that he has been seeing prostitutes for sex. I find it a turn off.

What can I do? She does not represent herself to be a psychologist, therapist, counselor or professional helper of any sort. Her responses are offered from the perspective of a friend or mentor only. Anne intends her responses to provide general information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual s. Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses. No correspondence takes place.

Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician. How long has this been going on?

Finding out about this after 23 years of marriage is tough to grasp. You need to decide what you want in this marriage. Your marriage is definitely experiencing some problems, to say the least. Talk to your husband and tell him that you still love him, while letting him know how unhappy you are. See if the whole family will go in for therapy. Let him know that his actions are affecting the entire family.

It is no surprise that your son is having problems handling this. Another option if your husband refuses to seek therapy is for the family to sit down and discuss this situation rationally.

Hopefully you can work this out. I also want to remind you of the dangers your husband is exposing you to by having sex with prostitutes.

There are many diseases that can be spread various ways not just sexually. Keep this in mind if you plan on trying to salvage your marriage.

More "Ask Anne" View Columnists. For those seeking addiction treatment for themselves or a loved one, the MentalHelp. Our helpline is offered at no cost to you and with no obligation to enter into treatment. With that in mind, would you like to learn about some of the best options for treatment in the country? Need help breaking free from addiction?

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Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician. How long has this been going on? Finding out about this after 23 years of marriage is tough to grasp. You need to decide what you want in this marriage. Your marriage is definitely experiencing some problems, to say the least. Talk to your husband and tell him that you still love him, while letting him know how unhappy you are. See if the whole family will go in for therapy.

Let him know that his actions are affecting the entire family. It is no surprise that your son is having problems handling this. Another option if your husband refuses to seek therapy is for the family to sit down and discuss this situation rationally.

Hopefully you can work this out. I also want to remind you of the dangers your husband is exposing you to by having sex with prostitutes. There are many diseases that can be spread various ways not just sexually. Keep this in mind if you plan on trying to salvage your marriage. More "Ask Anne" View Columnists. For those seeking addiction treatment for themselves or a loved one, the MentalHelp.

Our helpline is offered at no cost to you and with no obligation to enter into treatment. With that in mind, would you like to learn about some of the best options for treatment in the country? First you know, then the sharing stops. Is it possible to rebuild a partnership once the trust has been broken? Therapy is usually needed to address the problem and its fallout. The experts shared tips for coping with a cyber affair or flirtation, whether you're the culprit or the victim — and obviously, this advice has relevance for anyone dealing with infidelity of any kind:.

Have compassion for yourself, said relationship expert Stacey Martino loveandpassioncoach. Self-compassion is essential right away to get to the next level.

Rosenberg added that a breach of trust can trigger other emotional issues if they haven't been resolved. Be accountable for your actions. Healing can't begin unless the person who is caught admits to their wrongdoing. The least you can do, as the person who crossed the boundary, is to have empathy for the person who discovers it and express genuine remorse.

But this can be complicated if the person who is caught doesn't consider the cyber relationship to be an affair, he said. How do you solve trauma? You have to understand what the person went through and give them the opportunity to let it go. So that needs to be addressed, preferably with a therapist. Don't hang on to the blame game. Digital devices need to move into public areas of the house, with both partners having full access to the content therein.